Calmer

I am a bit calmer today. I was awake for much of last night spinning and arguing in my head and coming up with snitty little comments for NIB (New Italian Boss). Then, around 5:30am this morning (20 short minutes before I was forced to get up) I started calming down and figuring out what I needed to say to NIB to keep me in a positive light to all the superiors that matter at my company.

So, I got to work and started calling him. He never answered. He actively avoided my calls this morning. I think he knew he was wrong yesterday. He's still not getting out of this without a bit of a "Constructive Confrontation." (That's the Intel phrase for trying to resolve problems when someone is upset - using a positive manner and using "When you.. I feel..." phrases. The touchy feely stuff that actually works.)

Anyway, he avoided me like the black plague today. Which was ok - because at some point he is going to have to talk to me. And if he's a Cunty McCunterson* about it all - I will go and work for HR and begin providing management classes and sensitivity training for select assfaces. Does anyone know if the California harassment laws pertain to a manager who isn't located in the US? I know if a manager is located in Arizona, but managing someone in California they have to take the harassment training and all that. Not that NIB is harassing me (yet) - but it would be something good to know.

On a happy note - without my interference - the thing that he got so incredibly yelly about yesterday was overturned by someone with more authorita. Neener neener neener - he should have listened to me - BECAUSE I WAS RIGHT - BITCHWHOREMUCH?!?!!!!

Tomorrow (if he is brave enough to answer), I'm going to give my 2 cents in a positive and happy-sappy manner (which he may or may not listen to) and then just picture me dropping the phone, saying "Peace out - yo" thumping my chest twice and giving the peace sign.


*Name stolen from Suzanne at cuss - it's too awesome not to use as much as possible.

NIB Returns

Bleh...

Today freaking sucked. Sucked with a capital shit. I got so angry I almost hung up on NIB (New Italian Boss). Really... It took every ounce of self control I had not to hang up on his cunty-assholeyness (that is inspired by Suzanne).

I got yelled at today. YELLED AT!!! I'm a super duper awesome performer - always exceeding expectations - outstanding employee (yes, I have a big ego too) and I WAS SCREAMED AT FOR SOMETHING I DID NOT DO... Screamed at... really... WTF? The button pushing words that were dare uttered from my mouth?

"I do not think this is a very constructive conversation."

Which, it wasn't. NIB was not listening. At all. He was talking over me. And over my super bright and wonderful employee. He didn't care one nano-snatch about what we had to say. He wouldn't be quiet. And finally I made the horrible and terrible statement above. Most normal people will ask in response to the statement above - "Oh, how can we make it constructive?" Not go off on a tirade about something I didn't even mention - nor was I even thinking.

It was a conference call. And I had to put the phone down and I could still hear him yelling. I'm totally not shitting you. It took everything in myself for me to not hang up on him. One of my direct reports was also on this conference call. As was someone from an entirely different group. SO COMPLETELY unprofessional. After he finished yelling - I told him that I was speechless and that I was hanging up the phone. He actually said, "Ok, have a nice day. Goodbye." Honestly - WTF? Floored. I'm still floored.

I used to have a boss somewhat like this. And he yelled at me once in a staff meeting for an entire hour. This was 9 years ago. I would tune into him and listen to him rant (about something the person I took over for did) and about how bad I suck for letting my previous co-worker do this horrible horrible thing. When, I was just a peon - and I'm the one that uncovered the problem and was trying to fix it. In all of my management training classes that I give now - I use him as my bad manager example. He now is not allowed to manage people - because he sucks at it.

I think I have an entirely new type of manager to use as an example of a horrible terrible manager. For the years of 1999 - 2007 I had the world's most awesome managers. Two of them actually. Really. They were both super. I have a special love for them I think might be unnatural. But, I think I also took them for granted. Then, last year, I got a new manager (US manager) and he wasn't super, but he wasn't horrible. I can work with that. Just stay out of my way and I'll do my job and give you amazing results.

Nib though - NIB is making horrible decisions. Horrible. And then screaming at me when I try to just ask questions. Not even mean or rude questions - just questions. I guess there subordinates aren't allowed to question their managers. He also won't let me do what I do best - he won't let me do my job. It's making me uggy..

I'm still fuming. Maybe I'll go work in HR - they are all US people.

Things to do before I die

My 100 things to do before I die list (which is on the side of this blog):

01. Get a Masters Degree - DONE
02. Earn a Black Belt
03. Run (or walk) a marathon
04. See Great Wall of China
05. Volunteer in a Women's Shelter
06. Go to Australia
07. Start my own business.
08. Have a total net worth of $1M
09. Own a house with an in-ground pool
10. Be my own boss.
11. Parasail
12. Write a book.
13. Plant a Garden
14. Plant an orange tree.
15. Learn basic Italian,
16. Be able to do 30 "real" pushups
17. See the egyptian pyramids.
18. Go Kayaking.
19. Scuba Dive
20. Ride a bike a significant distance
21. Hike Half-dome
22. Try to surf.
23. Witness a salmon spawning
24. Visit Every State in the US.
25. Ride in a hot air balloon.
26. Ride a Camel.
27. Have a girls-only weekend at a spa.
28. Join a bunco group.
29. Take tap dancing lessons.
30. Have at least one blog site ask me to be a contributing author.
31. Grow my hair long at least one more time.
32. Learn how to really use Photo Shop
33. Learn how to really use Pinnacle.
34. Host a fundraising event for the foundation for fighting blindness.
35. Make people more aware of food allergies.
36. Learn joomla.
37. Declutter, organize and redecorate my house.
38. Have my children grow up to be non-dependant adults
39. Learn to take better pictures.
40. Get my public notary certification
41. Become PMP certified.
42. Learn how to use a serger.
43. Sew something useful on a serger.
44. See the Grand Canyon.
45. Find 1000 geocaches.
46. See a TV comedyshow being taped live.
47. Host a dinner party
48. Create a picture scrapbook of both kids from birth to their current age.
49. Successfully grow bonsai trees.
50. Go to Italy - DONE
51. See the aurora borealis.
52. Play in the rain with my kids.
53. Go camping with the family and tell stories around the camp fire.
54. Develop a production website for a business.
55. Complete my list of 100 things to do before I die.
56. Ride a motorcycle.
57. Exercise Regularly
58. Swim with the dolphins
59. Speak in front of 100 people or more
60. Make smores with my kids.
61. Learn to use Microsoft Expression
62. Change my own oil.
63. Learn how to tile (and tile bathroom)
64. Zipline

The most sad thing - there are only 64 things on my 100 things list (and 62 are not done). And item 55 - is to complete my list. I figure I'll do that sometime.

While this list is supposed to be inspiring - it actually makes me a bit depressed. There is so much I want to do - and my days are full of work and kids sports. Little time to actually complete anything on the list.

I actually just re-read through them and I'm relatively close to a couple. I might even be able to cross off having an in-ground pool in a week or so. And I'm still working towards a black belt - maybe in a year or so - that was a very long term goal.

I encourage you all to create your own 100 things list (or 64 it doesn't matter) and post your links in the comments.. If I was a really good blogger - I'd have a little graphic that you could post in your blog entry and once a month (on the 5th?) we can update each other on our 100 list. Ohhhh.... Maybe I'll add that as item number 65 - create a blog graphic that people can link to.

The Day I've Been Looking Forward To

I got to sleep in. Yes, yes, I know - I didn't think it would happen either. But, I slept in and the phone didn't ring. The kids didn't fight. I slept and I feel so refreshed. Until tomorrow - when I have to wake up at the ass-crack of dawn.

Anyway, we had a really really nice day - it was absolutely gorgeous. I did my typical errands of grocery store (and now since I go to Walmart - I get my drugstore stuff done too.) I got the Mother's Day gift ready for my mom and it's all packaged and ready to send tomorrow. Yippee! And then we did this:



Which was very cool. Unfortunately, the rocket drifted WAY out of the park and ended up in someone's backyard down the street. Hubby and Prissy were able to retrieve it and the woman at the house was very nice and said it happens all the time.

Then we did some geocaching. We had our geocaching mojo on today and found 4 out of the 4 caches we looked for. One was even a 2 stage multicache. It was perfect weather. The caches we went on were all pretty good hikes - so we got a bit of exercise in as well (and maybe some poison oak).

Then, we came home, cooked some dinner and I'm writing my blog super duper early. Rock on for me! It would have been a perfect day - except for the fact that I have to go to work tomorrow.

Oh yeah, did I mention we got a fence contractor and we're getting our fence repaired? We have to have it fixed before we can put water into the pool - so we need to get on it. Ugh. It's terribly expensive. Anyway, that is our wonderful day today.

Sunshine (although right now it's weirdly thundering and raining), rocket launching, geocaching, and just getting shit done.

Glee Coming

You know what I get to do tomorrow? Sleep in - that's what! Today from 8 until about 2pm was so incredibly busy. We squeezed in a baseball game, a softball game (which included scorekeeping), Bubba's Taekwondo, my and hubby's Taekwondo and a rec class for Hubby. Ugh... It was nice to be done. We had a relatively quieter afternoon.

No progress on the pool since the last pictures. I don't think they've worked on the pool since Tuesday. We got a fence quote and it's about 3 times as expensive as we thought it should be. But, after doing some research on materials - maybe it's in the right ballpark. We have to get the fence rebuilt before we can fill the pool with water.

Tomorrow - we have NOTHING. N.O.T.H.I.N.G... Just the normal chores... WE GET TO SLEEP IN!! I haven't slept in in weeks. I'm SLEEPING LATE!!!! NO ONE CALL - cause I'm going to sleep late.

You know that since I have made that declaration - I'm going to wake up at 6:30 and not be able to go back to sleep...

Close Talkin'

I like my personal space. I may have a bit larger than normal personal space need. (Ok, maybe I'm a bit of a freak. Instead of the traditional 7 inches, I need a least a foot and a half of personal space to feel comfortable.) I don't like it when people invade my personal space. Period. It's always been an issue with me. Even my kids are able to invade my personal space at times - especially while I'm on the computer. My co-worker is convinced it's because I'm an Aquarius (she is too and has the same problem. I guess we're both freaks.)

Anyway, the other day, I had to have an impromptu meeting with my division's controller - he's from Italy and is an extremely close talker. I met him and shook his hand and he stepped towards me, within a foot. Think about being your face being within a foot of someone you don't know. Too CLOSE. I stepped back. He stepped forward again and I let go of his hand and quickly backed up.

I led him over to my office. I was trying to step into my very very very small cubicle and talk to him - but he kept stepping closer and closer and closer... I was holding myself back from karate chopping pushing him out of my office. Back off, I kept thinking. I couldn't even concentrate on what we needed to discuss. I just wanted him to back.thefuck.off.

At one point, he kept getting closer and closer and I would step back farther and farther (in an extremely confined space). And I was finally sitting on my desk and pushing my phone out of the way so I could make sure this guy was outside of my personal space. Finally, I pulled my desk chair in front of me (while huddling on the desk sitting on books, mice, and papers) which I was able to perfectly place between me and close talker. Ahhhh... Personal space...

We finally finished our business, and he left and I climbed down off my desk and pulled the paperclips out of my ass. Damn - one more cultural thing I need to learn to deal with. I'm not sure I can deal with people literally being in my face. I'm just not comfortable with that.

Clearly he hasn't taken the "Working with American's" class. Rule #1: Appreciate the American's need for space around his or her body. If you notice the American backing up - this is not an invitation to step forward, it means that you making the person you are talking to EXTREMELY FUCKING UNCOMFORTABLE!!!! SO BACK THE HELL OFF...

I'm so poetic, I should write a book.

Thought I was so cool...

This week has been hectic - and even hecticmom hectic. We've had something every single day and night - either softball, baseball, baton, haircuts - which needed to be rescheduled, physical therapy, taekwondo, hubby traveling, scorekeeping, etc etc etc after a very very hectic weekend.

Anyway, my son is in Little League and part of the deal is that the parent has to volunteer at the "snatch snack shack." My daughter had a softball game and I was completely unable to get to the snack shack by 4pm because I work. And I work until 5. and I work an hour from where I live and my son plays baseball. So... I hired a teenager to cover my shit shift. I have been a bit negligent in paying him, but I emailed his mom last night and all was good and I was going to run over after work on my way to softball to pay him - and I gave him a little extra because I was so late (we're supposed to pay before.)

Anyway... I'm feeling pretty good. I did my presentation at 4pm at work. Headed out at 5... Got to the snack shack by 6 and paid the nice kid... Got to my daughters game by 6:10... Tomorrow, Bubba is getting an award at school, I moved my PT appointment. I'm going to PT, then to sign the kids up for soccer then to Taekwondo. I'm feeling pretty damn cool... Shit man, I can do it all!

Got home at 7:30 and started making dinner. I check the messages and it's the team mom saying that my teenager didn't show up. WTF? He was there at 6... It ends up that my shift STARTED at 7pm. DAMNIT!!!!! I thought I had pulled it off. I had balanced work and life. I had made all my inflicted commitments... Or not... DAMN IT!!! Now our team won't get the $100 for our team party because I didn't fulfill my responsibility. DAMNIT!

And I thought I was so cool...